Thursday, June 2, 2011

Busted foot blues

My foot continues to hurt. I went to a foot doctor, and he ordered me to walk gently on it when it didn't hurt - so I tried this, and the pain came back tenfold. New doctor time.

I met with my surgeon and oncologist yesterday, and they recommended a podiatrist. I called his office first thing this morning and made an appointment, but he can't see me for three weeks. I brought out the C-card and he agreed to put me on his cancellation list as high priority.

I'm having a hard time with this. Even throughout chemo, I could stumble down the street to look for birds. Now I'm stuck in the apartment unless we go for a drive. And it's not just my mental health that's suffering; my oncologist is concerned because exercise decreases the risk of a cancer recurrence by something like 40%.

I'm trying to react to this the way I did during chemo, and with my old arm-related repetitive strain injury - imagining creative ways that I can stay happy and healthy within the confines of my physical ability. I've been kayaking, for instance, and I'm thinking of joining a gym so that I can gently exercise on machines that don't involve feet. Oh, and did I mention that I'm eating like a pro? My new best friend is kale. Kale.

But at some point I get so damn tired of expending the energy to come up with fancy solutions for my body's collapse.