Thursday, July 21, 2011

Worn out

The radiation fatigue has hit me like a ton of bricks. I've spent the last week either sleeping or struggling so hard to stay awake. I have a whole bunch of things I want to write about - relationships, chemo, food - but I'm just too beat.

A couple of people have asked me what radiation is like, so here's a brief rundown. I walk in to a great big room, lie down on a table, and stretch my arms up. A bunch of techs make small talk with me while they adjust a million tiny parts of the enormous radiation machine. Then they leave the room, and a huge device moves around me, painlessly zapping me. I rock out (motionlessly) to whatever CD they have on, which lately has been... Celine Dion. A few minutes later they come back in and I'm ready to leave.

For the rest of the day I fight to stay awake. I struggle to be coherent in conversations, and to remember to take my pills. I chug through wedding planning tasks as best I can. On rare occasions I go and hang out with friends for as long as I'm able.

My rad onc says that the fatigue should go away in the next couple of weeks. I sure hope so, because there's a lot I'm supposed to be ... supposed to be doing... I... Zzzz